I get asked: “Did you drink a lot of coffee today?”

Or, and a bit more positively “How do you have so much energy?”

Admittedly some of my energy may be caffeine, personality style, childhood trauma, or plain old anxiety.

But I like to think that I and we  get our best energy, bounce, and enthusiasm through three key activities.

They are:

1. The Personal Factor:  (investing in our self spirit soul and body)

  • Giving of self in service to others and/or a cause
  • Good life skills: decision making, assertiveness, impulse control, problem solving
  • Sociability; ability to be a friend; ability to form positive relationships
  • Sense of humor
  • Internal focus of control
  • Autonomy/independence
  • Positive view of one’s personal future
  • Flexibility
  • Capacity and desire for learning
  • Self-motivation
  • Personal competence
  • Feelings of self-worth and self-confidence


2. The Group Factor:  (finding or founding a positive group with the following practices)

  • Promotes close bonds among team members
  • Values and encourages learning
  • Uses high warmth/low criticism
  • Exercises clear boundaries and norms
  • Encourages supportive relationships
  • Promotes shared responsibilities and  service
  • Provides access to helpful resources
  • Expresses high, but realistic, expectations
  • Encourages goal setting and mastery
  • Encourages positive social values
  • Encourages life skills such as leadership, cooperation, and flexibility
  • Provides opportunities for meaningful participation
  • Appreciates the unique talents and worth of each individual


3. The Friendship Factor:  (connecting another individual using the following guidelines) 

  • Give encouragement,  provide support,
  • Show acceptance of who you are,  appreciate you
  • Give helpful criticism only when asked
  • Reciprocate Share experiences and feelings
  • Challenge you to do your best
  • Adept at both empathy and listening skills